“And Joses, who was also named Barnabas by the apostles (which is translated Son of Encouragement)…” Acts 4:36

Perspective

I wonder about how I see people. How do I come to these arbitrary conclusions about someone else? Maybe it is the outward appearance. Tattoos, clothing, makeup, hair color or style send certain messages. Is it tone of voice, being too talkative or maybe saying too little? Is it the projection of personality, politics, and opinions? Is it rooted in race or sex or faith? We receive all these “messages” without thinking, but they surely influence us.

I’m thinking that beyond initial impressions, I am impacted by what they do, as in how they behave. Are they kind? Rude? Hypocritical? Narrow minded? How do they treat other people? Do their actions and behaviors line up with who they say they are? I am busy making judgments and coming to conclusions. I am making comparisons based on my limited knowledge.

From all these things, I form a picture of who this person is or at least who I perceive them to be. I am fairly certain that many times my conclusions are in error. I am looking at the outside. I do not know their motives. I do not see their heart. I do not know what past experiences have molded them. My perceptions of them are superficial. Thankfully, God knows their innermost being.

I remember a time when I was told someone thought I was a bit snobby. What? Because I was not talkative and “friendly,” I had projected an impression of aloofness and arrogance. It is certainly true that I could make more effort in the “social graces,” but I did not mean to push this person away. In fact, I rather liked and admired them.

By way of contrast, I knew a woman once that I greatly respected. As time passed, that appreciation of who she was in both word and deed increased. What initially grabbed me was her ability to see the good in people. She was genuine. She was open and accepting and on the alert for goodness. She was encouraging and validated every good quality she perceived in others. She praised them—to their face and out loud.

I want to be more like her. I want to see others through God’s eyes. I want to be willing to encourage and use every opportunity to validate, compliment, and underscore the good I see. I want to speak God’s own truth to them. I know that God has seen things in me that even I didn’t see, or know, or understand. He used those with hearts attuned to His to speak these realities into my life. I would not be who I am today without those declarations and insights. I am grateful for those that spoke to me and encouraged me in the Lord.

“But speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head—Christ” (Ephesians 4:15).

Father, My heart is too small. I pray for eyes to see the good in others and believe Your best for them. I pray for love and grace to speak into their lives as You have spoken in mine. May we fully become the women You would have us all to be in Jesus. Amen.