“Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice; and be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God, for Christ’s sake, hath forgiven you.” Ephesians 4:31, 32
Get Rid of the Grumpy Grudge!
A few months back, my husband and I had a deep, lengthy discussion covering some issues that were concerning to him. I will keep the topic confidential, but it was not a foreign issue for us and likely for many others as well. Many sensitive points surfaced for both of us. I listened and there was much give and take during the conversation. It is never good to keep things bottled up, especially between husband and wife, and I was grateful he felt comfortable enough to trust me with his concerns. That is, until I had some time to mull things over and let the enemy have access to my thought life over the next days and even weeks.
What I started to notice in my behavior was something I have never experienced before in our marriage. I was taking my resentments and “me-centered” thinking and expressing them through my actions and words towards him. Little—and I mean miniscule—things that would never have bothered me before were getting under my skin and I found myself arguing with him more than ever and being extremely critical of him. He would express a thought, and I would retort with an opposite opinion. He would make a suggestion and I would immediately disagree or huff in disapproval.
Less than a week had gone by, when I felt that all-familiar Holy Spirit tap on my shoulder that this was NOT acceptable behavior! It could have been the beginning of going down a dark, lonely, and bitter path. I confessed my behavior (and where the root of it was coming from) to my husband and apologized. I never want to treat the one I love that way again! Such behavior most certainly may turn him off from ever in the future voicing himself, which is not what I want at all.
“You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the children of your people, but you shall love your neighbor (husband) as yourself: I am the LORD” (Leviticus 19:18).
“Father, I am ever grateful for Your Holy Spirit, this wonderful gift You have left us! Keep my heart ever sensitive to Your voice so that I can love others well. Amen.”